I figured I should explain the reason for the title of my blog. "Living Life on Fire" best explains what my life is like right now. In many ways, I feel like my life is upside down, topsy-turvy, spinning, or "on fire." Here's a few:
First, we are a fire family. As previously mentioned I'm married to a firefighter/paramedic. Our lives are very much entwined with all things fire related - primarily in regards to our schedule. Our family's schedule revolves around Hubby's fire schedule. His schedule with The Big City is 24 hours on and 72 hours off. He's eligible to work overtime shifts on the middle of the three days off. Often times, he chooses to work that overtime shift (when overtime is available). So, sometimes we literally only see him every other day, and part of that day is often spent sleeping. I work a full time job, and Brother goes to daycare during the day, so we may have one night together every other day for several weeks at a time! This schedule is tough on Hubby due to the stress and fatigue of working a paramedic schedule, and it is tough on me because basically I become a single mom every other day. But, when overtime is not available, well, we get to enjoy Hubby's 3 days off! This inconsistency sometimes makes me feel as if we live our lives in a whirlwind. We can go from the relaxed schedule of Hubby having 3 days off and having more family time to the hustle of Hubby working every other day for several weeks and vise versa. Stop, Go, STOP, GO. Plus on top of that, Hubby helps out with the local fire department in Our Small Town. He carries a pager which could call him out anytime of the day or night on his days off. I think you get the picture.
Second, being in the real estate industry has had it's up and downs over the years. I feel (and Hubby agrees) that I am at a point in my career that I have to evolve in order to maintain this career for the long run - not only for myself but for my family. This change is very exciting and a little daunting at the same time. I've always enjoyed broadening my horizons, but I fear the loss of income that may (and probably will occur) while I pursue the next level.
Third, with a new baby on the way in two months, well who wouldn't have a feeling of their lives being turned upside down?!
Lastly, both Hubby and I have our families in very close proximity to us. We all bascially live in the same area. While having our families close is a blessing in so many ways, making sure Brother spends equal time with both families also contributes to the topsy-turviness of our lives. What little free time I can wrangle out of our schedule is usually spent with our families.
Would I change any this for a more peaceful life? Absolutely not! Fire/medic life is Hubby's passion. It's what he lives and breathes for (well, second only to our family). It's his calling - he was born for fire service. It's what makes him who he is, and I wouldn't change a single thing about that. I have the opportunity to expand and grow in my career, and it would be rather stupid of me not to do it. As for babies, having a second child will change our family dynamics in so many ways, but I wouldn't dream of changing that either. In two months, Hubby, Brother, and I will have a beautiful baby girl who will be the next piece in our family puzzle! Having family so close is stressful, and I sometimes wish we lived far, far away. But I want my children to grow up with the benefits of having family so close and knowing that family is important. In so many ways, God has blessed us, and although it may be hectic I wouldn't change it. "Living Life on Fire" is a way (I hope) for me to put thoughts in writing to help make sense of all the craziness in my life - a way to mentally wade through my roller coaster way of life. Things aren't always easy, but they aren't always hard either!